The GLB Lifestyle Message Board

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Advice Request January 02, 2012

from NadiaandMollysNana   Albany

I am 71, live in Public Housing, and am not LGBT. The activity director in my building wants to invite LGBT Seniors to our bi-weekly dinners, which are often followed by live music and dancing. We have 170+ tenants, some of whom are outright homophobic, and resent the director's efforts at "forcing them to accept those . . . (insert your own insult). While I agree that our population needs some sensitivity training, I am concerned about several things: 1. I've suggested she strategize with our social worker about advance "education" before inviting folks from the larger Community who may expect a more enlightened welcome, especially if they choose to dance romantically, giving the most hostile a chance to stay away on that occasion. 2. She thinks this would offer our own LGBT residents a chance to be more open. My fear is that one, especially, a transgendered person in his/her 70's, will be driven even deeper into the closet if residents are openly rude to those who do choose to be Out. Am I simply being too cautious? Our family has friends whose son recently completed the surgery for Re-assignment, and whom they have accepted, now, as a daughter. But she has left the area to alleviate the social discomfort of interacting with both her own and her parents' former friends. I could just butt out and let our director do her thing, but I'm very concerned for the feelings of all involved. Any advice anyone has would be appreciated.

RE: Advice Request January 03, 2012 from amjjad   Highland Park My dear I command. you on your. efforts to bring unity. and understanding. to an age group that has not been raised. with the freedom. we. now have .for my experience as a gay male from a Latino background. I can relate. I believe. strongly. in the facts that. we all are human. beings and. no matter. what our choices, or prefences, may be we are created equal by theAlmighty. one common aspect shared by all. its owesome to hear your desire to integrate social. harmony amongs the people. In your living community. may. all. be achieved and continue to share your wisdom. ok after all without our senior. we the middle. aged. ones wouldnt have today's freedom. do know that people. like you make a difference and it may take a while but your intentions are good. persist my dear you will percivere .all the best to you.

RE: Advice Request January 05, 2012 from kiwigirlinarizona   Phoenix Hello NandMsNana...i am not gay but i believe your concerns have merit...a social event like this where there is/could be hostility endangers the wellbeing of LGBT residents and all concerned and care should be taken... maybe the director could arrange a private event for the LGBT residents and invite those who are not offended by their lifestyle...more planning is necessary so as to ensure all residents are safe and happy with the environment they live. They do not have to like each other, but i do not think it wise to throw kerosene on a fire...maybe an anonymous poll or questionaire could be sent out regarding acceptance or non acceptance of those with LGBT lifestyles. For those that are not put off by the lifestyle maybe they can leave their name so they may be invited to private LGBT functions at a later date and all replies can be left in a box...Only office staff will know who are the LGBT and those accepting of it...a private event will not irritate those against and no harm will be done. I think the director should wait and let anxieties die down abit and then try again with more subtlety. Should you just let the director do her thing?...no...because then you will be living in an environment of hostility and only when you have exhausted all avenues to try and find a solution to this, will you be able to accept that you did all you could to prevent unrest. And thats all you can do...The director does not have the right to instigate unrest no matter how good her intentions are... I commend you and thank you for caring so much about your community.

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RE: hi January 03, 2012 from amjjad   Highland Park Hi Miracle .you sound like. a very sweet person. was delighted. read your post of course. we can be friends. and thank you. for the compliments. so feel. free to reach me ok.

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